10 things you should NEVER say/do to an MK

   When MKs go to events (usually church gatherings or mission events at churches) they commonly have at least one, maybe some or even all of the actions listed below. NEVER do the following! :

1.  Put them in the spotlight, make them stand in front of kids their age or everyone, and talk about 'how awesome they are!' .....

 Unless you have their permission to talk about their ministry (or whatever) NEVER do this. In fact, ask them if they would like to introduce themselves and let them do the talking. If they refuse, drop it. They are a regular person, with normal fears, and are not superstars.

     2.   "I mean, you are, like, so cool. I mean, living overseas! How awesome. I wish, like, I were                you."

 Over-praise and over-exaggeration makes anyone nervous and ill at ease. And just so you know, life overseas is not always so awesome. We have political trouble, personal trouble, and the problems of other people to deal with. Just make it a mental note to treat MKs as normal people! Because that's what they are.

    3.  "Do you speak African?"

         (there is no such language)

 Depending on where you live as an MK, you will be asked this question by SOMEONE. Let me tell you from personal experience, it is very annoying. Just assume that they have to learn to speak the native language there, and that not all native languages are the name of the country (like America and English). Or just say, "What is the national language there in <insert country>?"

   4.  "YOU DON'T HAVE TV?!?!? YOUR LIFE MUST BE DRAB! I COULDN'T LIVE                         WITHOUT MY TV. I AM NEVER GOING THERE..."(toss of head)

 When a boy at a church said this to me, I was speechless for a moment. No television is the worst reason not to go on a mission trip. It's actually good for you to go without your TV for a while! And ministering to lost souls is way more important. If you meet an MK without a smart phone, or iPod, or TV, or Kindle, or really, anything you see as a must that's actually a luxury to many, don't make a big deal about it. Even if it's running water or electricity. 

   5.    Assume that they stay out in the bush, see elephants and lions run past their bedroom                     window, live in mud huts, and work with half-naked savages. 

Just don't. Even if they live somewhere like the Philippines or even a West African country like me and my family, there are cities that are developed in all countries, even North Korea, so don't judge.

   6.   Think that stuff like deodorant, food, blenders, suitcases or clothes are bad gifts. 

Food is an important thing. MKs pig out on junk food that is unavailable where they live. Do not hesitate about whether you should take them out to eat or not.

 Deodorant is a story of its own. An MK was pumped when he got his favorite deodorant for Christmas. The next day the family was held at gun point, their house was robbed of virtually everything (including the deodorant) and they were tied up till help came. The only words that came from his mouth were, "They even took my deodorant stick!"

  7. "Do you, like, know what a computer is?" (or MineCraft, or smartphone, or whatever is popular at the given moment)

  Just because they live in a different country doesn't mean they are technologically ignorant. What if you were from, let's say, small-town Tennessee, or just Tennessee, and someone said that to you? How would YOU feel, then? MKs are people too and they feel the same way.

 8.   "What's it like?"

  Not only is that an extremely difficult question to answer, as it is such a broad question, it also gives the feeling that you think they live in a different world. They don't.  Just a different country.

9.   "Are you looking forward to going back?"

All MKs struggle with this question. Stay on the safe side. Do not ask this question. Or, "Do you like it there?" The truth is that all MKs are on a continuum of what they think about their living situation. Often, MKs won't know how to respond to the question, "Are you looking forward to going back" because they are not sure themselves.

10.   "Do you miss home?"

Don't even. Just don't even ask that question. The truth is that MKs won't know what you mean by "home." Do you mean "the place where extended family reside in the United States" or do you mean where their own family lives in their host country?

NOT ON YOUR LIFE

You will thank me later